SUFFERINGS and CONFUSION..

Just the other day a friend got annoyed with me saying that I am in a habit of suffering..But I personally feel whatever happens in my life..good or bad, takes me a step closer to my-SELF.. God is the goodness of our deeds..HE is within us making us divine..Being God is easy but being human is a tough job…!

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I suffer because I feel

Feelings keep me human

Being human makes me suffer

All this because I feel?

Or its all because humanity lacks

And humans suffer?

~~payal~~

LOVE..

I have always believed that love is the base of all the relations between individuals as well as their relation with Nature and Divine..We can never see love but can always feel its presence within us and in our surroundings.. a love-filled heart creates heaven out of hell! Love helps us to grow patiently with faith,it makes us more loving,more human..Love connects us in this journey called Life where we all are the travelers..

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"From one of my old write"

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From mother earth

till child birth
Love exists..

Love is god
and
God is love..

.
For God
G overns
Our
Destiny..
~~payal~~

Bleeding hearts (Haiku)

 Pink hearts in spring bleeds!

…Die back into dormancy….

In the summer's heat!!
~~payal~~
Nature shows its bleeding heart in form of these beautiful flowers..:)

A BITTER TRUTH

Smiles and laughter

Becomes momentary

When a sudden outburst

Makes them feel guilty

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Blood ooze out again

From the wounds left sore

In unanswerable quest

They indulge to the core

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Restless their hearts pound

And the tears roll

With extra burden

On the soul

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..Stoned…They stand still

To move with wisdom

Oh! Such is this relation

True for some... for rest its illusion!

~~payal~~

P.S. I visited the page "sometimes you forgive people because you still want them in your life"on fb and read this on the wall "Trying To Forget Someone You've Loved Is Like Trying To Remember Someone You've Never Met♥ " Just a thought..what if you have loved someone whom you have never met?Its possible,isn't it?Confused!Would you remember him/her or would you try to forget?!?Complex situation it would be..hence this write..

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1448322018&v=app_2347471856#!/note.php?note_id=424261244687

That day..

I longed to witness that sunshine smile
Alas! It rained heavily all that while

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I heard the cacophony from the yonder valley
Ashes mixed with sand in blind alley

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I plunged in the depths of the words brewed
Intoxicated, the substance rests clued

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I experienced the beauty of the pearls cherished
That shimmered on lids as the lands perished

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I conquered the fears that grew with time
My path glistened with untamed rhymes

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Then I witnessed a smile in the golden shades
Flowering breeze cajoled as the spirits swayed
~~payal~~

A Lamenting Insomniac’s Plea….

I wish to sleep tonight…….

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Exhausted by the enigmatic chores
Of the dreams and hopes
Of the mired slopes
An empty bottle of sleeping pills,
Artificially flavored`
A glowing night lamp on the bed side,
And the silent aura scares me now
.
..Please put me to sleep tonight
Gently caress my hair
Hold my hand and sit beside me
Talk to me for a while
One last time..till the time
I slowly close my eyes

.
Read few words from the yore
Or sing me a lullaby or
Read your favourite bed time story

That you still remember
And put me to sleep

.
I wish to sleep tonight
I wish to rest in peace….

~~payal~~

Chimeric Utopia

‘Twas a full moon night, twinkling sight
Sweetness and light, its’ magic was white

Like the sonorous bells of anklets
Was the sound made by the crickets

Unseen was her play and dance
That night he met her all by chance

Beneath the lemon tree
She wished to set him free
Bedazzled by her charms
He lay dead in her arms

Then the chimera screamed…
Ah! a gift of sepia dreams

‘Twas a full moon night, twinkling sight
Now the passion ignite, a burial site..
~~payal~~

Climate changes..

Climate changes..The lakes and the ponds freeze but the fishes do survive in the depths…breathing an aura of the residuals..experiencing the white winters,the chills, even in this humid weather,the thoughts run afar.. leaving me stoned…even though the sun shines bright outside, all needed is its warmth that might act as a tranquilizer..Maybe I am missing….!The winters..(off-course)!
~~payal~~

Mirage

Thoughts manipulate in the closed spaces

Sometimes in the circle the mind races

The wild images indeed vivid and clear

Occupies in dusk, in dawn disappear

:

As the maple trees in autumn ablaze

Mystically a spring emerge diluting the haze

But the deep black horses gallops in the backyard

The beclouded aura smells of the vicious card

:

Baffled, the journey ends from where it begins

An eerie stillness with the gabardine of sins

Thus longing for the leaves to open up

Alas! They close again with a mild touch

~~payal~~

Yes,once in a blue moon..I write..

When the mist envelops my whole

And the feelings silently engulf me

A polished pebble then creates

Ripples in the river flowing within me

:

When the life seems distant to me

And the land-slides from beneath my foot

It gives a sudden feel

Of getting lost in the woods...

:

When I find myself trapped

Or at times linked to the unknown strings

Mercilessly when the shades fade

Or when the birds fight fluttering their wings

:

When a crow flies with a twig

Passionately to a nearby tree

When a pearl slides from a grass blade

A thought seeps in with a long story

:

When the sun shines on a cactus flower

I have something to share

I write and rejoice..Life, as it is

Then with ease I walk on air…

:

Yes,once in a blue moon,I write..

~~payal~~

खट्टी मीठी ज़िन्दगी के भूले बिसरे पल...

खट्टी मीठी ज़िन्दगी के भूले बिसरे पल
यादों के झरोखे से आज झांकते हैं

:

:

सीने में दबे हुए अनगिनत जज़्बात
वक्त के साथ धुंधले नज़र आते हैं

:

:

ओस में भीगे सीले हुए पत्ते
मोती बन आज आंखों में टिमटिमाते हैं

:

:

सागर में निरंतर उठते ज्वार भाटे
अक्सर साहिल पर आकर शांत हो जाते हैं
~~पायल~~

सुर संग तान मधुर घुले जब..

सुर संग तान मधुर घुले जब
प्रीत अधूरी गीत बन जाये…
धुआं उठे जब आहों से तब
हिमनदी भी पिघली जाए

धरती संग गगन झूमे जब
सागर यूँ हिचकोले खाए
सीने में उठे तूफ़ान तब
जीवन नय्या डूबी जाए

सांझ ढले दिया जले जब
रंज-ओ-ग़म दूर हो जाए
पलकों पर मोती सजे तब
सतरंगी फ़िज़ा में घुल जाए

यादों के गलियारे में जब
तारों की महफ़िल सज जाये
चाहत के मेले लगे तब
दूर कहीं मेघ नीर बरसाए

~~पायल~~

LOST IN DREAMS....

Dreamt in my dream..last night
They walked together side by side
Crossing the orchards and the meadows bright
Through the woods moon played the guide

The abundance of nature and dew drops inspired
They crossed the mountains and reached the stream
It started drizzling when the dark clouds perspired
In the lap of nature was their dream theme

Slowly the pines shimmered and swayed
On a rock they sat hand in hand
Ripples in the water the pebbles made
Time slipped off in between like sand

Soon the silver lining appeared
They felt like heaven in each others embrace
The halo of the silence persevered
Over the bridge shined the rainbows’ grace

Exotic flowers blossomed delicately
Swiftly and softly with the breeze
Marigold,Pansies,Daisies and Lilies
Caressed the souls and the moment ceased..

They noticed not the changing seasons

Maple leaves with smashed prism
Parallel lives in different directions
Made them realize now it was autumn..

I woke up in my dream ..last night
And tried to push that dream aside
I saw two hearts sparkling bright
But they were no more side by side
~~payal~~

A MIDWAY

In a relation where two people are involved
The grief and sorrows should be mutually resolved
People don’t know the depth in your relation
Have they cared for any of your emotion?
Don’t hesitate you’ll find some solution
For the relation was your own creation
To deal with the upsets you run to seek aid
But don’t forget its your life that fades
People might console you and wash your brain
Ruthlessly injecting venom in your veins
Mutually compromise, give it a try..
When you trust why to regret and cry?
At the end its’ just you who’ll suffer
If you let go of a relation life shall be rougher..
For few good souls touch your heart
Then why to blame and why to part?
~~payal~~

उलझन....

ना जाने क्यूँ यह ख्याल आया
और अंतस में घर कर गया
दूर पड़ा एक कागज़ का टुकड़ा
कुछ सुनी हुई कहानियाँ सुना रहा था
अपने हाथ में उठा कर
अपनी हथेली से दबाकर
उसकी सिलवटों को हटाया
और गौर से देखा
तो परछाइयों में क़ैद
छटपटाता हुआ एक साया नज़र आया
जो अनायास ही चीखने चिल्लाने लगा

वो देखना चाहता था
अपनी आँखे मूँद
महसूस करना चाहता था
रुकी हुई धड़कन को
उड़ना चाहता था
पंछियों के संग
गाना चाहता था
कुछ अनसुने गीत
पहचानना चाहता था
ख़ुद को..

पर बदली हुई गति
से आख़िर बदल ही गया वो साया
अंधेरों में भी
महसूस कराता था जो अपना वजूद
आज सिलवटों में लिपटा हुआ
अधूरा सा दिखता है अब
पड़ा हुआ है कहीं दूर
अंधेरों में ढूंढता है अब अपना वजूद..
ना जाने क्यूँ यह ख्याल आया
और अंतस में घर कर गया !
~~पायल~~

Am I challenged by my senses??

My taste buds are burnt
With the venomous drink
Sweet fruits or the sour
Now just make my heart sink..

When the glass breaks in my hand
I get a feel of déjà-vu
Still try to be strong the way I am
The blood turns deep blue

I hardly grab any word from them
When I listen to the preachers or the priests
Never I punished for shearing the sheep
With time the turmoil do cease

I can smell the cataclysm drain
And wish to be heard by the honey bees
When the fluttering birds I see around
I hold it back and the goodness leaves

I can see but can’t figure out
The hiding places for pain or pleasure
Ripped apart,burying myself
hunting for the fossils or the treasure..

Am I challenged by my senses?
~~payal~~

“GRAY”-ASYLUM OF CHIMBEL

They bribed the lords for a piece of heart
Which they could call their very own
Lord granted their wish with a price tag
And said one day they will be disowned

They nourished and protected their piece of heart
With love they prepared it to fight against fears
Now disowned they live in another home
No one to lend them a patient ear

Plastic smiles on the wrinkled faces
With countless questions in their eyes
Half dead or half alive?
Lean bodies in colorless dyes…

The eclipsed lives wait patiently
For the death god to free their burdened souls
They try to laugh with unbearable pain
Virtues of children, their lips extol

To the rest it seems a worthless bargain
As when they die,the dooms day befall
Abandoned they are burnt in the woods
Their “piece of heart” don’t hear their call
~~payal~~

जाने कहाँ....

विचलित मन
एक घूमता हुआ आइना सा
भटकता हुआ
अठखेलियाँ करता,
अधीर,असहाय सा
अक्स दिखता उसमे निराकार
कभी कुछ मेरे जैसा
कभी दिखता वो बिल्कुल तुमसा

पगला सा मन
न कोई विकल्प है
न कोई समाधान
फिर भी निकल पड़ता है
बदहवास सा किसी खोज में
दूर जाने क्या तलाशता हुआ
जैसे मैं निकल पड़ी हूँ
जाने कहाँ यूँ ही लिखते लिखते..
~~पायल~

A PLEA...

Just that I am a girl

Am I not a part of you?

Why do you want to kill me?

Won’t it ever hurt you?

Give me life,mom

I’ll never let you down

I’ll always make you proud

Adding a feather in your crown

I want to sleep in your lap

Will you make my wish come true?

You’ll ask for me one day

When girls will be just few..

I want to live

I’ll always be with you

Can’t you feel my heart?

Mother?Aren't you?

~~payal~~

"GRAY"

They bribed the lords for a piece of heart

Which they could call their very own

Lord granted their wish with a price tag

And said one day they will be disowned

They nourished and protected their piece of heart

With love they prepared it to fight against fears

Now disowned they live in another home

No one to lend them a patient ear

Plastic smiles on the wrinkled faces

With countless questions in their eyes

Half dead or half alive?

Lean bodies in colorless dyes…

The eclipsed lives wait patiently

For the death god to free their burdened souls

They try to laugh with unbearable pain

Virtues of children, their lips extol

To the rest it seems a worthless bargain

As when they die,the dooms day befall

Abandoned they are burnt in the woods

Their “piece of heart” don’t hear their call

~~payal~~